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The term bi-curious (aka curious) typically describes a heterosexual person who is curious about being romantically and/or sexually intimate with a member of the same sex, or rarely/occasionally a homosexual who is curious about being romantically and/or sexually intimate with a member of the opposite sex. These are individuals who either openly or secretly are contemplating it, fantasizing about it, or have actually had an encounter or two and are still battling as to whether or not they liked it or would even do it again.
In looser usage, bi-curious makes no reference to sexual orientation and usually refers
to being romantically and/or sexually curious about the same sex. The term rarely or occasionally in looser usage refers to (implied homosexual attraction) being romantically and/or sexually curious about the opposite sex.There may be uncertainty about one's sexual orientation as well. Bi-curious is also sometimes used to describe one who has a desire to be sexually intimate with a member of the same sex, but hasn't acted upon it with the idea that one becomes bisexual (implied heterosexual experience) once one has had a sexual experience with the same sex. This usage is a misrepresentation of the requirement for bisexuality and therefore isn't really an accurate usage of bi-curious.
Some other inaccurate usages of bi-curious:
- A person who is or wants to be sexually intimate with a member of the same sex, but won't date a member of the same sex,whereas a bisexual is willing to date a member of the same sex.
- One who fantasizes sexually about the same sex, but doesn't want to be sexually intimate with a member of the same sex. A bisexual in contrast may desire to be sexually intimate with a member of the same sex.
- A person who is sexually curious about the same sex, but who has little or no sexual experience with a member of the same sex, whereas a bisexual is thought to have quite a bit of experience with the same sex, but such a person with little or no experience may still be bisexual.
More precise explanation
While the definition above is good enough for some, a more academic definition with greater respect for the distinction between biology, gender identity, sexual orientation and sexual behavior would be as follows:
Bi-curious typically indicates an interest on the part of the person identified as such to retain a particular sexual orientation that involves attraction primarily to people belonging to one gender, while having an emerging attraction to people and/or activities that do not strictly conform to that person or others notion of that particular sexual orientation. It is most often used as a label for people who primarily identify as heterosexual, not bisexual, but who challenge some of the boundaries imposed by the labeler's notion of heterosexuality.
While it is, like bisexual, heterosexual, etc., a term of self-identity, bi-curious is also a term found more often than not in personal ads and in the marketing of sexually explicit dating services and literature to people who primarily identify as heterosexual. It is also used by peer support groups in order to reach out to people who are wrestling with personal sexual orientation issues. On rare occasions it is used by conservative religious groups to lure such individuals into forums where self-questioning and sexual experimentation are harshly discouraged.
Some consider bi-curious to be a trite label for its implication that one's sexual orientation is merely a behavioral choice that one can "try out". Others consider it to be a form of denial or homophobia, and that having an interest in more than one gender is by definition nothing less than bisexuality. Such complaints are often predicated on widely-held, but nonetheless contentious, beliefs about the nature of sexuality and gender — concepts that some feel are well-defined and constant, and that others feel are relatively fluid.
Identification as bi-curious or even bisexual doesn't necessarily require an interest in having sexual or even physical relations with more than one gender, just as celibacy or relative disinterest in sexual activity don't necessarily preclude identification as heterosexual or homosexual. The level of interest and desired degree of intimacy that is required in order to identify as bi-curious varies from person to person.
People identified as bi-curious may or may not strongly identify as male or female, may or may not strongly identify as heterosexual or homosexual, and their physical features and behavioral affectations may or may not be seen as being androgynous.
Like bisexual, the term bi-curious is sometimes applied to situations that do not fit easily into common definitions of heterosexuality and homosexuality. For some, bi-curiosity may be an aspect of pansexuality.
See also
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